Shakespeare by 9th graders

So I gave my 9th graders a test over Shakespeare. One of the questions was to "translate" this quote into modern English:
"O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou Romeo?
Deny they father and refuse thy name
or if thou wilt not, be but sworn my love
And I'll no longer be a Capulet."

It's not as hard as it sounds. We talked about that quote specifically, since they need to understand that wherefore means why, not where.

At least 20 of them forgot this interesting little fact THAT I TOLD THEM 25 TIMES. EACH. Not that I'm, y'know, bitter, or anything.

But my favorite translation was this:

Romeo, where you at?
I'm not gonna listen to my father
I'll get with you and change my name to Montague

Got a bit of flow going, doesn't it?